Its about that time

So, the time that I have been dreading is rapidly approaching.

We are now far to close to my husbands deployment date than I feel is necessary. lol

Its a weird emotion for me.
I'm super excited for him to go. I know that he'll learn so much and get to do a lot of things we just can't do stateside.
but I don't want him to go. lol.
But I'm excited for him to leave because I have a lot to do this term and its hard to get all the time to do it when i'm trying to spend all the time I can with him.
but I don't want him to go.

You see what I mean?

But as much as I want him here. I'm super excited for him to get there.
plus he's ADD is out of.fucking.control.
and his deployment shit is fucking everywhere!!!

I'd like a clean house please.

My husband got in a fight with a ZOMBIE!!!

No seriously!
He was!

Okay bear with me on this one, I can't make this shit up.

 So last night we went to 6 flags in Vallejo, CA and got tickets to Fright Night. We got the roller coasters and then at 6 the park switches over to "fright night" and all the zombies come out and the haunted houses open. It was really cool.

We went through one and it was a "miner" theme. It wasn't scary but more a "jump out of no where" type of thing. We were right behind a family with teenage girls so they got all the screams. I even offered my beer to one zombie. It was pretty good. 

We went through one that was a "pig slaughter" it was real Hills Have Eyes shit. NOT FUCKING FUNNY! Scared the fucking shit out of me. Bri got mad because I took the "chicken exit".

The third one we went to was a "junk yard" theme. It was pretty freaky, not going to lie.
We got through the most of it. and in the middle we went around a bend and there was a fence with 2 empty oil barrels. B saw the zombie and put himself between it and me. So the zombie jumps up to scare us and goes to hit the oil barrel with a steel pipe.... well he hit B instead.

Fucking swinging for the fences and NAILS B right across the top of his right wrist. The poor kid look petrified. he couldn't have been older then 17. he was so freaked out that B was going to hit him.

So I put on my bitch face and we booked it out of the house. we didn't get stopped by a single zombie the rest of the way out. We get to the end and tell the security guy what happened.
Then we waited.
Waited for the EMT (park rule).
Waited for the "lead" on this house.
Waited for the supervisor.
Waited for guest services. etc etc.

All we wanted was for the kid to be talked to and be more careful. I mean it could have been a small kid. and we wanted our money back. We still had 2.5 hours of park to go. It was such a cluster. 

The worse part is this can effect B's PT test and B's deployment. If he's on lifting restrictions, he can't do his job with a lifting restriction. then if he can't do his job, he can't get deployed. 

I mean its to fucking funny.
He has the best legit story

"DUDE what happened"
"Zombie Fight"
BOOM! 
lol. 

I Miss My Husband

ugh.

I do okay most of the time. I keep myself busy and distracted. but there is normally one day during each trip that i just get "home sick" that sounds weird since i'm the one home, but its the best way i can describe it.

I miss him, but its more then that. Its just the security. Its the comfort. Its the..... its everything.

We are separated, we move, we pass each other on trips....
he's my home.

.... le sigh.

He gets home Saturday. I leave sometime monday (the trip has been on and off more times than I can count. So I just plan on leaving until they tell me not to).

Today I cleaned the kitchen, did 2 loads of dishes, sanitized the counter tops, swept, swiffered, tomorrow i'll mop, did 3 loads of laundry, folded and put away 3 loads of laundry, dusted the wine wrack and dry bar, re loaded the beer fridge, picked up the bedroom and living rooms, tomorrow i'm going to vacuum and dust. The last time he was gone (about oh.... a week ago) I scrubbed the shit out of the bathrooms and showers.


I'm running out of shit to clean.... I clean when i get anxious.

I started my period today to boot.

There's no point to this.... I just had to whine for a bit.
 

Long Weekend

This weekend was a military weekend. And as most of them go it was busy, stressful, slightly chaotic, and oddly wonderful in spite and because of all of these.

I am still really sick.
I thought i was on the mend and over did it today. I think losing everything I've eaten today taught me a big lesson in that. Not to over do it when you're still recovering.

Right now i'm downloading Audio books onto my cell phone so that I can listen to them while i sleep.

B is gone... again. This time he's in some hole in the wall place in Texas.
I dropped him off at the airport first thing this morning.
I find it sad that I don't cry any more when he leaves on these short trips.
I think with the ever present thought that there will be a really long long LONG trip coming up soon that I'm able to put these frequent little trips into perspective.

But back to my weekend. My drama troop is back.
I'll type out that story tomorrow, Its a doozy.

Saturday we had a lot of meetings and training to do. My troops were scattered everywhere.

     I had 2 out-processing to finally go to tech school. Poor kids. They have to go back to being "new" and treated like they just joined the military because the school they needed closed their doors and moved from Texas to Virginia. So they've been functioning members in our unit for almost a year now. Now they have to go back to "basics" (no pun intended) and be treated not as prior service, but as baby new kids.
     My troops that just came home from deployment were doing their last  minute travel vouchers and they were preparing for a trip to Washington (annual tour)
     Most were in inspection prep meetings and training. While the remaining were at the Passenger Terminal (PAX) with me doing some training.
     My drama troop is back. I'll type out that story tomorrow, Its a doozy.

Sunday wasn't bad. I took B to the airport so I was roughly 20 minutes late (30 when you throw in my detour to starbucks). My goodness my troops must have known I was down because they sure were SPOT ON today. I mean, as spot on as you can be at 20 years old with the attention span of a puppy. focused ... focused ..... focused .....focused..... SQUIRREL !!!!! So I gave them a break and we left at 1030 for lunch. i think we meandered back to the unit and to work around 1. It wasn't like we didn't do our work, we just got it all done really quickly and efficiently that they earned a break. I'm pretty hard on them most of the time. I expect greatness and nothing else will do. Tough, Hard, but fair.


Then Sunday afternoon my first and #1 favorite female officer (B's my #1 favorite lol)made "Full Bird" Colonel today. I cried during her ceremony. I've known her for as long as I can remember.

She was in my fathers unit when i was young and she was a young LT
She was my first commander when I joined the military and joined my fathers unit.
She was in my second duty station when we moved bases to Washington
She was down her when we moved to California and I joined this unit.
She's just always been there.
Now she's taking up a really good and important roll at a base in Illinois. I don't see myself heading there any time soon. hahaha.

I have a lot of pictures on my phone to add. I'll add those to my next post in a bit.
I'm going to go lay down now.
I don't feel so bad when I'm laying down, its in every other position and movement that seems to reek havoc on my body. not so fun

but my books are finally loaded.
good night bloggers

The summer of crazy

So this summer is already starting ot look like its going to be insane. Between my schedule, B's schedule, leave, pending deployment, etc.  we'll be lucky to make it though with only slight mental damage. 

get this:

May 9th - 2 Finals

May 10th -1 Final 

May 11th - 1 Final

May  14th - 2 Finals

May 16th @ 0800 graduation practice

May 16th @ 0820 parents arrive (little brother will be here around this time)

May 16th @ 1700 graduation

May 17th - Parents leave

May --  - B leaves

May 25th  -  I leave

May -- @ some point  - B comes home

** B goes back on nights at work

May 28th - I come home

June 2/3 - Drill

June --  B leaves

June --  B comes home

June 30th - anniversary

July 6-8th drill

July -- - B's birthday

July 16-19 - On leave - probably camping

July 29th I leave

August 3rd I come home

Aug 4/5 Drill

Aug 7-16 - On leave - Probably camping up back home.

September/October 2012  -- B is deployed

 ugh. My anxiety is out of control about all of this.

First phone post

So this is new to me on so many levels. First I am new to this whole 'smart phone' thing, second I'm in a new state of mind. Third, I'm an insomniac posting from my bed when I should be sleeping.

So my fine friends, shall we catch up??

Lets start with school. Wednesday was my last day of spring term and my last day of my first term here I Cali. What a b* of a term it was!!! So in Oregon the school terms are way shorter, think a 2:1 ratio for 'spring' terms. I took 20 credits this term: 1) history & English class 8cr. 2) interior design - materials & techniques 4cr. 3) math - Intro to algebra 4cr. 4) health online course 4cr.

To say it was an intense term is putting it mildly. But I honestly didn't really feel the weight of if until roughly the last 3 weeks. That's when I started to feel like EVERYTHING was due at the exact same time. But to be honest I really enjoyed the term. I learned a lot, not only in the classes but about Cali schools and about the people too.

I have a 10 day break, then summer term starts. I transferred schools due to budget cuts in the Interior design major at the first school. Which stinks because I really enjoyed the girls in that class. But I cant wait around for the classes I need.

My health - I decided to do this topic next because it directly effects my military career and my weight loss goals.
So I'm not sure how much I posted about this before but since about the first of the year I have been battling debilitating migraines. Ive been in the ER 4 times im 5 months, seen 4 different doctors, and have been on countless meds. Its been a rough go of things to say the least. So I finally got a GREAT doc and nurse and things have been looking up. They found out I have a significantly under active thyroid, so I am on daily pills for that. I had a sleep study done, I go in on the 1st for those results. That was an interesting experience. I literally had a pony tail of wires on me head!! I really hope I don't have to do that again, but it is a possibility.

I'm currently on:
1) birth control pills (low hormone)
2) thyroid pill
3) sinus/migraine pill
4) migraine pain pill
5) daily sinus spray

I think I'm missing something, but you get the idea. I know it seems like a lot, but it seems to be working. I've only been to the ER once on this mix of pills, lol. OH!!!! I forgot to tell you I get to sleep with that sexxxy nose strip breathe right thingy, its pretty badass!!!

Military- so I try my best to do my best at whatever I do. But in my military life, I seem to have something that always kept people from seeing my full potential... Until now! This unit has afforded me the opportunity to prove myself and shine!

Ive been able to start a new training program. Ive taken on a lot of responsibility as the booster club prez. Ive started trying to get additional training done for people in need of it, not just in my section.

We had a BIG inspection last month and my troops did outstanding, our section didn't get a single bad note! I'm so proud of them.

Now... If I could only pass my PT test, I would be golden. Its the one stinking pile of shit in my meadow of flowers. As soon as I pass the test, I'll be able to do so so so much more. It will be the last obstacle in my path towards WORLD DOMINATION... BWAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!

Speaking of my fitness, on to my weight loss goal...
Now that I can post from my phone, I think I'll be able to update that blog more.

I was seeing a personal trainer, but she kept canceling appointments, and eventually quit on me. I had seen another trainer in the gym, and after one of my canceled appointments I stopped her and asked if she had any openings. Thank goodness she did. She's amazing. I call her my tiny nazi! I mean it in the best way. Shes so motivating and tough at the same time. She has a track record of passing scores. So I really don't want to break that record.

I have SO much riding on this test, I have to pass, their is no other option.

Well..... That about wraps it up. Ill try and post Mor often. It will be easier now that I have this option.

Later gaters.

Talked to my husband

About whats been really bugging me.

I told him that I'm really struggling with being so far away from my family and my friends. and that I'm not sad that I stopped being friends with the two girls here, but its just difficult.

I told him that I get that he needs to get out of the house. and so it doesn't bother me that he goes to the gym to play basketball with the guys. but that leaves me home for another 2 hours alone.

He said, why don't you go home for spring break. and to be honest. for a weekend it would be great. but I don't want to be gone all week.

He asked about the girl I talk about in my math class. I told him that she seems down to earth. we've just become FB friends. lol. He told me to set up a "girl date"! haha.

I cried. but he was really understanding.

I had to tell him that my school is different then my school. He went to class with the same people for several classes.

I go to 3 different classes and see 60 different faces. i'm lucky if i make a connection with 1 person.

He said that hopefully when I transfer schools it will be a bit more structured so I can make a little more connections between people.

I'm hoping to get out of the house together maybe go hiking for a couple hours or something like that.

I'm still not 100% mentally, but I feel loads better getting it off my chest.
I've been super clingy lately and today he got really annoyed at me (to be honest if the tables were reversed, i would be too). so i just told him how i was feeling.

Ugh. PMS. Pissy Men Syndrom

Gah. B is on a fucking rampage tonight.

Right after I got home from class I was doing some chores around the house. He did the dishes last night while i did my homework. I said thank you for doing the dishes more than once.

So today I didn't have any rush homework, so I decided to clean out the fridge and do the dishes from the leftovers.

He walks in the kitchen (after I cleaned out the fridge, took out the garbage, took the cans to the curb, and was in the process of emptying the dishwasher) and says... "well, looks like you made short work of that!" Implying it didn't take me long to make the kitchen a mess agian.

Then after he got home from working out, he see's that I rented movies. He gets so upset that I rented movies. He tells me to stop spending money because we need to save money. I get it, but for FUCKING SERIOUS. its $17.00 every couple days. He works nights. there's only so much TV a girl can watch before she goes bizerk.

He can be so hard on me sometimes. I go in to his office to say I'm sorry and that I didn't realize that it was hurting us financially that much and I wouldn't rent so many next time. and he says... and i quote "yeah yeah... you didn't realize..." and goes back to his computer.

We hang out have dinner (I made roasted chicken breast and onion potatoes) watch a movie (The Other Guys) and everything seemed cool.

Then I couldn't get a jug of cranberry juice open, So I took it to B in his office to help.

He asks why i'm drinking cranberry juice, So i tell him. He asks "oh yah, whats in the freezer?" I say, "huh?" He says, "got some vokda did you?"

uh no... You told me last night that even 2 beers has an effect on my meds, why would I switch to hard alcohol?

I know he's just so tired, He doesn't normally act like this. But come on!

Its just that he needs sleep.

We were supposed to get our cable upgraded. The cable guy was supposed to be here around 2-4

he showed up (waking b up) at 115, waking B up. he normally sleeps until 4-430.

I love this man with all my heart but i'm so over today.

Its the small things in life...

So B and I both have our own offices now. We'll be in the same house, just feet apart and spend hours by ourselves. Me with my design work, pictures, coupons, blogs, facebook. Him with his NBA2K10, His FPS games, his research, and NBA draft picks.

But just now I was sitting here getting my fix of crack (aka frontierville and farmville) and he came in and pullled my chair back a bit kissed me on the forehead and asked If I wanted to go watch Ghost Hunters on OnDemand with him after his game.

I of course said yes!
But It kinda made me tear up.
Its the little things in life that really make my heart swell.

The more things change, The more they stay the same

So I was reminded today about the circle of life in the world of the military.

A fellow blogger Chelle @ The Winey Mommy said good bye to her husband today. She sent him off to serve his country and do is duty. It breaks my heart and makes me thank the lord, that at the moment I have my husband.

Its kind of interesting, like the world wanted me to realize how lucky I was. I happen to log on to blogger minutes after she had posted on her blog about saying good bye.

I had been complaining to my friends via texts that i was trying to 'sweat my way to a better mood' in the gym. I was upset with B about something really really really stupid and petty this morning. I left the gym still feeling cruddy and now I felt cruddy and sore. When I logged on and saw her post I got out of that mood pretty darn quick. Nothing snaps you out of a cruddy mood here faster than seeing a fellow military wife lose half her heart.

And I also fine it at no coincidence that today is also the 9th anniversary of 9/11. Sometimes its easy to lose focus on what is important in life and what you should be thankful for. But today... today I was reminded of how lucky I am. I hope on a day like today, that has forever changed many lives, I hope you all stay thankful.

I hope you all hug your loved ones a little more securely tonight.
I hope you all thank the lord for the breath you take and the kisses you get.
I hope you all are snuggled down with the loved ones you have (may they be 2 legged or 4)
I hope you all remember
I hope you all stay thankful.

Long Time No Post

So the big moved got pushed up.

I'm currently sitting in California!!!!!!

We not only got out moved pushed up over a week. but they did a pack AND move in 1 day (14 hours mind you!)

It was a chaotic hecktic week to say the least.

30th - monday- got back from family vacation. I spent time with my little brother and mom at my aunts lake house. My dad was in southern california officiating a wedding for my cousin.

31st - Tuesday - Architectural Graphics final presentation

1st - Wednesday - Packers come. find out today that they're packing and moving TODAY. In one day (instead of three days). Made a bunch of phone calls, changed reservations, called relatives and informed everyone about the change in dates and moved my drive from saturday to friday.

2nd - Thursday - finished all the last minute stuff. emailed my final project to my teacher for Computer Drafting class. hung out with BFF A and awesome godson Dom. Treated B's awesome dad to lunch and he helped me pick out a GPS system.

3rd - Friday - Left for cali - I meant to leave at 7 am. I went to my parents house to say goodbye one last time and then when I went to drive off, my mom saw a fresh spill of oil and told me to come back. Come to find out, when i had my car serviced (on tuesday btw) they cracked the o-ring on my oil filter. I went to the shop and sat there. they opened at 8am. one of the guys showed up at 7:20 to open. He asked how I was doing, and I told him what was going on. He said he'd open it up right quick, clear out a bay, and get me in. I was in the shop and out in less than 10 min. In the mean time my mom brought me starbucks and breakfast (lord love her). I was on the road by 8am and on the freeway by 830.

At the half way mark I stopped at a rest stop to let sammy out of the car to stretch, pee, etc. and..... I locked my keys in my car. I called our insurance people and wouldn't you know it, we had emergency roadside assistance. I didn't know that. The insurance guy had to call a sister agency down where I was, and get a recommendation on a shop to come help me. The guy showed up in 20 min and I was on the road in less than 45 min. I made it down here by 5:45. I got checked into our room and was crashed out at 9:30. it was a long day. driving for 10 hours takes a lot out of you.

4th - Saturday - I picked up my AWESOME husband at the airport!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! after 5 months apart he was a sight for sore eyes. It was an amazing feeling. It was the first time I had been the one waiting at the Airport. Normally, I'm the one on the plane. I didn't realize I would be that nervous. I was texting a fellow military wife, she told me it was normal. Weird feeling though.

but I'm here, we're here. We're safe and sound.

I'll post more later. but i'll let you all digest the week i just had. I know i need to digest it too.

3 years ago today

...I married the love of my life

... I said "I do" to growing old with my best friend

... I became blessed by being married to an amazing man

... I became more happy and whole. He's my missing piece.

I love him with all my heart and soul.

_________________________________________________

OH the joys of being married and both being in the military.

I came home from my first duty location June 06 and met B.

we started dating and then I left for Germany in November.

December I was home and he asked me to marry him.

January I left for military school in Missouri.

March 07 I came home on my birthday. Our families meet the DAY i came home.

June 07 we were married. B starts nursing school that next September.

Jan 09 I was deployed during his last term of school & I missed his graduation.

we were together for a year, with a couple mini breaks for B to go help another unit in... Mississippi i think.

and a year almost to the day that i came home and he leaves for almost as long.

I missed his graduation from officer school because we couldn't afford for me to fly down.

lol.

I've spent 2 birthday's home since i was 18.

And now i spend tonight, my third anniversary, alone in my bed... with the dog. UGH!

but that's okay... Its the life I chose.

I've never been more solid. I've never been this happy. I'm blessed

My 400th Post...

For my 400th Post... Its going to be short and sweet.

This is a pretty big event (close to the big 500). So I thought I would include something that's pretty big in my life at the moment.

As I've mentioned before. My husband's away at Officer Training School. Then he'll be at a nurse transition program until September.

So I thought I'd grace my blog with the first picture of my husband in blues & as an officer. Its a pretty epic thing.


In case you couldn't guess, I'm having a serious case of writers block. but my husband is kind of a big deal. lol.

Lesson in Leaving

Lets just classify these last 2 days as "one of those days". You know where you just don't quite feel 100%.

There's really no reason for me to feel off, but i do. I'm healthy, I'm relatively happy, but its just not the same with out B here. I know, I'm lucky, i get to talk to him almost every day. On the weekends sometimes multiple times in the day, with text messages to boot.

This is the longest time I've been away from him and been home. Its weird to be home to be honest.

When i was in Iraq. I was gone roughly: 135 days

B will be gone roughly: 116 days.


No one really understands how you can possibly be away from each other 100 days or more from your husband, wife, or loved one.

Its not easy.... but its how I've known to live.

There's really no point to this post. but I've been feeling all mixed up and jumbled and its kind of hard to get out a fluid thought out if my life depended on it.

but eh. whats a blog for if not to spew streams of thought, no matter the completeness of the thought.

I think I'll leave you all with this picture. My friend was messing around on photoshop and made it for me. I love her and I love this picture!

Life after leaving.

So i think its day #3.

I haven't returned back to work yet, that's tomorrow. But I've been keeping busy. After my Uncle's funeral, we've had a LOT of people in town.

My grandma's been in town and I've been spending a lot of time at my parents.

I've been lucky enough so far that B's schedule has allowed him to call me every night before bed. i know I've been a bit spoiled, and I'm aware. I told him tonight that its okay if he's to tired after his day to call me and he wants to go right to bed.

I love him with all my heart and i can't wait to see him again.

I told him today that i miss him. and he told me he doesn't think he'll be able to go the whole time with out seeing me. He graduates this school at the end of June. but he wants me to come down and visit on the next school where he'll have more freedom.

I might have to take him up on that offer.

I'm such a sucker for that guy

Day Number One!

Today B left for some military schools.

Today is day #1 of being alone and holding down the home front. Its interesting.

here's a recap of today:

I dropped B off at the airport at like 4am this morning. His flight ran long! but he got some sleep and got some food in his system.

and then... they over booked his flight so he had to wait on other people because they're dumb (one of his biggest pet peeves)

and then... he was flying for the first time on a prop plane.

and then... they lost his bags. They found his bags and they came in on the next flight.

my poor husband.

he starts his school tomorrow afternoon. i told him to drink his last beer (if he could) or soda and lay on the bed and relax.

I on the other hand:

have cleaned the living room
done the laundry
cleaned off the dining room table
cleaned off my desk
gone to lunch with my bff
bleached the counter tops
did the dishes
went to dinner with my parents

and.... drank beer lol.

I'm a worrier by nature and i take it out by cleaning. hahahahaha

so I'm laying here in bed struggling to find the urge to fall asleep ::insert yawn here:: (<-it really did happen). And so i figured I'd get back into the swing of things with the blog,

lose this second wind, and hopefully CRASH OUT.

wish me luck on my first of many nights alone here in the very near future.

Holy Moly

My last post was March 2nd!?!?

MARCH 2ND!?!?!?!?!?!?!

jeebus.

lets give you an update.

Me:
-I'm still working for the devil's bitch
-I still hate my job
-I plan on quiting as soon as its possible
-I've lost 30lbs since December
-I fell down a flight of stairs a while back
-I'm still in physical therapy for my neck
-I hate my job
-Muscle spasms in my neck make my life HELL!
-I'm training for a 5k
-I'm just living and loving life

B:
-He was accepted to Active Duty Air Force
-He got his Commission early this month
-He is awaiting his orders
-He is supposed to leave sometime late this month
-He is going to be gone for 15 weeks worth of school

US:
-We're getting stationed in California
-I'm getting set to get 1 term of school done while B's gone
-I can't wait to get back into school
-I'm going to miss him while he's gone, but I'm excited for him to go so i have some alone time.

Thank the lord

B got the phone call today.

I'm officially married to a 2nd LT select for the United States Air Force!

Thank you god!


thank you to everyone who prayed
thank you to everyone who sent us good thoughts
thank you to everyone!

In need of prayers/vibes/good thoughts

What ever you do, i need it... well we need it.

B is going to find out ANYDAY NOW, if he was selected for the officer program in the Air Force.

We need this like you can't imagine.

please send us a good thought. he's a good man. he needs this.

Its the simple things

There are often moments, and sometimes they’re so simple, that just make you think how lucky you are.

Last night after a hard day's work I came home, feeling kind of frustrated. When I walked in the door B stopped his game, got up, and looked so excited that I was home. He walked into the living room and gave me a big old hug and a kiss. I was shocked and my mood was totally switched

It’s the little things like this that make me so lucky to have him.
He makes me so incredibly happy and he doesn't even do it on purpose