Battles

Long story short:
shitty childhood + bottled up emotions + 20plus years of life= a lot of anxiety and stress

So I've been working on my anxiety and personal issues for a long time. Its been a long and slow battle. My amazing husband understands and works with me on it. He's probably the only reason I even want to improve on my issues.

So for the most part I know what i'm stressing about when i get anxiety issues or panic attacks. I can normally point out an event, an issue, a thought, a something that triggered it. That is normally, but every once in a while i just have a rise in anxiety and I'm not quite sure what it is that's making it happen.

That was yesterday. Yesterday i had a migraine all day and my anxiety was through the roof. When i get a head ache like that all i can do is lay down. its not an enjoyable thing. I stopped eating because i was coughing so bad and gaging so bad. my anxiety is through the roof.

I thought about it all day. Bri was having assholeitis last night. that's where he's a bigger asshole then need be. an inflammation of his assholeness if you will.
(is it bad to laugh at your own joke?)

My head ached finally loosened its grip on my brain around midnight last night and i was able to get a little bit of sleep.
The past 3 nights now I've been getting super sucky sleep. I can't fall asleep till way way late. I get up 3 or 4 times in a night sometimes for an hour or more at a time and I'm wide awake early in the morning. My body is rebelling against me all of a sudden. I'm pretty sure if i could find the source of my sleeping issues i could get a grasp on my anxiety.

My anxiety was so bad yesterday. Today I'm just cold. lol. i fell asleep with the AC on last night. But so far the day is looking up.

Bri called me this morning on his way to class. I think that's an amazing way to wake up in the morning.

This blog really doesn't have a purpose. I might have to start labeling these i think. This one should be random ramblings. Battles
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