Sunday, January 11, 2009 4 comments

so as most of you know...

i've been activated and being deployed.
i'm blogging on a differant blog thats private.

i'll try and let you guys know whats up over here. but it'll be hard to keep up 2 blogs on a weekly/daily basis.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009 4 comments


So reality hasn't really sunk in.
but i'm 99% done packing.
i'm getting ready i'm working on it.
but it hasn't hit me yet.
thursday night, i'll be a mess.

i'm pretty proud of my self or holding it in as much as i have.
but as soon as i start thinking about how much i'm going to miss B i get chocked up. i can't think about it or i will cry. so ya.

i'm waiting on my uniforms to dry, then i'll pack those, then i'll pack my towels aroud everything.

then all i have to do is pack my back pack (carry on) and i'm done. HOLY CRAP!!!

Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but in looking together in the same direction
- Antoine de Saint-Exupery


Good Morning.
Its Tuesday.

HOLY SHIT! its fucking Tuesday.
okay so I'm almost done packing.

today i have to go shopping again. i need to get 2 pairs of running shoes, a pair of black flip flops, mouth wash, and something else but i can't remember.

I've got to clean out my wallet and transfer it to my new smaller wallet. Ok, this is really girly but i think its kind of nice. For Christmas i got B a new wallet. So I'm going to take his old one with me and use it. yeah, i could get a new one, a cleaner one, a more girly one, but i like the idea of having a small part of him with me every day. silly yes. but it works for me

I have almost everything packed, i have to pack the last little bit right now. my uniforms got treated for bugs and mites last night. So once their dry i think I'm going to pack them in garbage bags, and then pack them. they kind of stink. if you've ever cleaned guns the smell is like gun solvent and bug spray had a baby and that baby was liquid and poured all over the clothes. lol.

on another topic, i won 4 dollars on a scratch it this morning. that was kind of cool.

I'm really rambly right now. but I'm pretty calm at the moment. we'll see how that goes after my shopping trip today. I'm going with my little brother. I'm kind of excited to spend time with him. he's really really freaking funny.

OH SNAP! i almost forgot to tell you about my dinner last night.

okay so the dinner didn't go so bad. the in laws were at the other end of the table. I really tried to like them and include them. it was really nice. they were slightly annoying but at least we're done with it and its okay.

my dad gave me a gift. he called it my "moral gift" he had some random stuff in it. lol. like electronic games to take on my trip. Then he gave me something that made me cry.

he gave me the flag my mom sent him while he was deployed. he put stuff inside the folded flag. he put in his dog tags, an air force brat coin, an 83rd coin (our old unit), and a dog tag i gave him when i joined that says "daughter proudly serving". i cried. I have the most awesome and supportive parents EVER!! i'm so excited. i love them.

I actually got a decent nights sleep last night. which is surprising. i don't sleep well lately.

Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family: Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.-- Jane Howard

Sunday, January 4, 2009 2 comments

To Do List

Thi is my current to do list.

  • go shopping
  • do all laundry
  • pack
  • do the web based training
  • get a will
  • give husband-unit power of attorney
  • get life insurance
  • clean the apartment
  • put away all clothes i'm not packing
  • write letters to my family
  • move important pictures to portable drive

When people ask me why i'm stressed, i should just show them this.


My "family" good by breakfast

So i texted my sister in law yesterday telling her when i was leaving, and that if they wanted to see me that this weekend would be the best, if not only time. So my SIL drove up to see me and they stayed the night with my mother in law and then asked if we wanted to meet for breakfast to have one last time before they went back home, and i left. Well we invited my in laws. apparently they couldn't get up early enough to come see me for breakfast.

I told MY parents that i wanted to do dinner Monday or Tuesday and no later because i didn't want to push my time line. So My in laws told my sister in law that they would "meet us for dinner later this week". but B (my husband) won't call them, and they haven't called us. I will not move my parents dinner, nor will i go out to dinner any other night. Sorry not happening. i have shit to do and stuff to get ready for.

I feel like they're treating this like, oh its not our son, so its not that big of a deal. I've felt like this for a long time. i know its probably all in my head, but this is just one issue of many. i don't get it. they can't get up and out of bed early enough to come meet us for breakfast. I'm telling you, its not like we met up way early. 9:00-9:30 is not early.

grrr... i guess i shouldn't expect my in laws to be like my family but its just depressing in a way.
Now B wants to invite his parents to my family dinner.
gosh. i don't want to sound like a spoiled brat, but i was hoping that my family dinner would just be "my family". But how do i say that? how do i tell him that his mom over powers and takes over all conversations, all get together's, everything. I want the focus to be on me and my family and spending quality time together before i leave. but i think this might be to much to ask.