Wednesday, June 30, 2010 0 comments

3 years ago today

...I married the love of my life

... I said "I do" to growing old with my best friend

... I became blessed by being married to an amazing man

... I became more happy and whole. He's my missing piece.

I love him with all my heart and soul.

OH the joys of being married and both being in the military.

I came home from my first duty location June 06 and met B.

we started dating and then I left for Germany in November.

December I was home and he asked me to marry him.

January I left for military school in Missouri.

March 07 I came home on my birthday. Our families meet the DAY i came home.

June 07 we were married. B starts nursing school that next September.

Jan 09 I was deployed during his last term of school & I missed his graduation.

we were together for a year, with a couple mini breaks for B to go help another unit in... Mississippi i think.

and a year almost to the day that i came home and he leaves for almost as long.
I missed his graduation from officer school because we couldn't afford for me to fly down.


I've spent 2 birthday's home since i was 18.
And now i spend tonight, my third anniversary, alone in my bed... with the dog. UGH!
but that's okay... Its the life I chose.
I've never been more solid. I've never been this happy. I'm blessed

Tuesday, June 29, 2010 0 comments

Sleep Deprived Blogging

(preblog warning: its not labeled "random ramblings" for nothing)

I'm sure this is the new "it" thing. Sort of like blogging while sleep deprived is the new black. lol, or at least that's what I'll tell myself.

Hey, blogging is better than laying in bed at 12:10am talking to myself right?....right?
::whispers to self:: "RIGHT!"

PHEW! good to know.


So last week I started back to school. I seriously forgot how hard summer term is. Its my first term back in almost 2 years, that's enough time for one to forget.

I'm taking 3 in class and 1 online.
I'm taking (brace yourselves for this)

  • Architecture 101 - Architectural Graphics
  • Art 101 - The History of Art (which actually focuses more on the history of architecture)<-online
  • Art 215 - The History of Residential American Architecture
  • ID 125 - Computer Drafting for Interior Designers.

yeah, i know... you're jealous. ::cough-NOT-cough::

But seriously. on Tuesday I'm in class 9am-2pm & 6-8pm. and on Thursday I'm in class 9am-1pm & 6-8pm.

All in all, not as bad of a schedule as I expected. I have a long enough break that i can justify driving the 30 min back home. For some reason the campus just seethes anxiety for me. I get anxious just being on campus, why? couldn't tell you. but i do. If I'm IN class, like, actively taking notes, participating in discussions, etc. it doesn't effect me so much. Walking from my class room to the student center to get a smoothie... INSTANT anxiety spike. wish i knew why. no idea.

But last week wasn't so bad all in all. Hard to get used to getting up early again (time is currently 12:18am) but I'm getting back into it (sort of).

Most of my classes I really think I'm going to enjoy. the only one I'm a little worried about is ID 125, because I've taken something really really similar before, so i think I'm going to get bored easily. The teacher seems really cool though, so it should be okay. I'm my Art 215 class, part of my homework was to sketch where i live. You mean you WANT me to doodle? okay then. no problem! lol. so i let Sammy wander in the grass, i sat on the sidewalk enjoying the cool air and sketched. it was pretty awesome.
this weekend I had drill for the first time in 6 weeks. This whole A weekend/B weekend thing is screwy. One month I'll have 2 drills with in 2 weeks, and then i won't have one for 6 weeks... not so fun.

But this weekend I did have to do my PT (physical training) Test. And I'm a little ashamed to say, it was a "do or die" situation. If i didn't pass, i couldn't re-enlist. and if you know anything about me... not re-enlisting was NOT an option. but I've been training hard and pushing myself and you want to know what. I DID IT! I passed more than i could have imagined. I'm so stinking proud of myself!!!

we won't go into weight or inches (cause ick)
but I did do:
35 push ups in 1 min
42 sit ups in 1 min
and i ran 1.5 miles in 13.28.

HOLY SHIT! It was AWESOME. I almost threw up after my run. but whats a little upchuck between me and uncle Sam? And let me tell you what a weight it is off my shoulders that I've passed.

now the battle is keeping it up and pushing my self to do it next time with OUT DYING! lol. I'm in so much pain today. We ran yesterday at 2ish. and just sitting down to pee is an epic battle of muscle vs gravity. Its a good thing all i had to do today was study. so i sat around a lot. my body is thankful for that.

[random sidebar] the thing i hate about being up this late is i always get munchy hungry around 12:30-1:00am. never.fails. [/end random side bar]

But all in all it was a good weekend/week.

back to school
Feeling good about classes
went to drill
trained 35 marines how to do my job
got called out by a E7 in a different section to help him do a job (way cool)
passed my PT test
drove home safely
mom made me dinner (she watches Sammy when I'm at drill)
she even made an extra whole dish for me to take home so i didn't have to cook ALL WEEK!

I have to say, I'm a pretty happy camper right about now.

now... if only i could get some sleep.
::makes eyes at Mr.sandman::

Monday, June 21, 2010 3 comments

Random Ramblings turns slightly insane.

So, Rotty, now that you have all this time on your hands what are you doing?

Oh funny you should ask. I’ve kept myself busy
1) I started sewing
2) I’ve cleaned a lot
3) Lots of organizing
4) Oh and I’ve developed this nasty little habit of talking to myself


So tonight wasn’t so good, I had a lot of issues. I’ve been really sad with B being gone. So I do what has become one of my favorite things to do when I’m stressed, sad, or upset.
I turn on the shower (extra warm) and sit. I sit in the bottom of the shower, close the shower curtain and hang out.

There is nothing more relaxing to me than sitting in the shower, letting the warm water beat down on me and think.

So I’m sitting there in the shower, and I’m thinking. And I’m thinking, and I’m thinking.

So I decide to talk out loud. Maybe it was like a prayer out loud (just talking to god… naked), maybe I was talking to Sammy (who was sleeping on the bath mat), or maybe I’m slowly spiraling into a quiet insanity. Either way….

I know that I’m being a whiney crying brat. But its how I’m feeling. I’m having issues with B being gone. It’s weird, very weird. I’ve decided I like being the one deployed MUCH more.
It’s just so different with him gone. The one constant since I came home is B. He’s always been home. Always been here for me, and now he’s not. Now he’s the one who’s gone, and it’s hard to get used to.

Tomorrow I start my first day back to school in almost 2 years. And there will be no one here to say ‘good luck’, or ‘good bye’, or ‘you can do it’.

The fact that B’s in the field right now doesn’t help any. I know that while he’s been gone to this school I’ve been so spoiled. He’s been able to communicate with me almost every day. I know

I’m going to have to get used to this, but right now. It sucks. HARD CORE.

Sorry that this is so rambly and whiney. But I just needed to get it out.

Sunday, June 20, 2010 1 comments

First Sewing Project = DONE & AWESOME

So I just recently started getting into sewing, and I'm really excited.

So today I went to the craft store, and got everything i needed to get started! So excited.

I got a 'starter kit' I saw at the store

I knew from messing and practicing that i needed bobbins, so i got some standard ones. I'm not up to speed on the threading your own bobbin, so i got already threaded ones. the one missing is a black bobbin that I'd already put in my machine.

I also knew (from watching YouTube videos) that i needed straight pins to keep it all in line, so that's what i got.

Now to start with the fabric, i looked on the discount rack and wound up finding a decent fabric for i believe 4.00 a yard. I knew my pillow was roughly 24" x 24". And according to the lady cutting the fabric i needed 1 1/3 yard's of fabric. I took her word for it.
I laid the pillow on the fabric and cut around it. Not the best idea i know, but I didn't know what else to use.
(this is after i had ironed it to set the seam.)
The seam's aren't ruler straight, but that'll take practice. they're pretty good for my first project.
here it is with the pillow inserted. Its a little bit bigger than i had meant it to be. But that's not bad.

Finished product on the couch.


Wish me luck

I'm about to start my very first sewing project

I'll post pictures when i'm done.

My mom brought over my sewing machine from the house, so that while B is gone i can have something to work on.

I went to the fabric store and bought a semi-decent fabric that was discounted, and then some thread and a begginers sewing kit.

i'm pretty excited.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010 2 comments

Dear Blogger.

Please stop commenting on my blog! All of your ... are a link I refuse to click on. You are annoying and I wish you would quit.
Thank you


Oh how I love thee..

Jillian Michael's. but this post isn't about her... even though I love her.

So I fell in love with Jillian on Biggest loser (we all know how obsessed i am with BL). But now she has her own show during the off season of BL.

Losing It with Jillian (Tuesdays @ 8pm on NBC). We'll yesterday's episode featured the May family.

Jillian's Trying to find a love for Ashley May!

She's gone so far as to create a blog. And lord knows i love a good blog. Now you're throwing in a love story on top. Yep, I'm sold.

So If you're interested. Follow Ashley's Journey for love @ Ash Needs Lovin'!

I still love me some Jillian. Its bordering on obsession. but thats another story for another day.

Monday, June 14, 2010 0 comments

My 400th Post...

For my 400th Post... Its going to be short and sweet.

This is a pretty big event (close to the big 500). So I thought I would include something that's pretty big in my life at the moment.

As I've mentioned before. My husband's away at Officer Training School. Then he'll be at a nurse transition program until September.

So I thought I'd grace my blog with the first picture of my husband in blues & as an officer. Its a pretty epic thing.

In case you couldn't guess, I'm having a serious case of writers block. but my husband is kind of a big deal. lol.


Saturday, June 12, 2010 0 comments

What do you do...

To Relax?

Lately, I've been very worked up into my 'poor me', 'I'm so lonely', blah blah blah blahness... So I've decided to take a few moments to relaaaxxxxx.... *slooowwww siigggh*

So what do you do to relax?

1) reading in the sunshine

2) a cool glass of sweet tea.

3) This may sound weird, but. i like to turn the shower on, and then sit or lay down in the shower. When i used to get bad anxiety attacks, this was the one thing that would bring me down before i broke. It has an amazing calming effect.

4) blogging. You'd be surprised how many posts i type out, or half get out, but don't publish. Sometimes when i have so much in my head... typing it out helps.

5) Curling up in bed (sometimes with a beer, lol) and reading until you can't keep your eyes open. I really do enjoy my reading.

So What do you do to relax? if you repost, please comment me a link. Thanks

Wednesday, June 9, 2010 0 comments

Website RAVE!

Today I bring you: Plastic Land

I'm focusing mostly on the Home Decor section of this website!

I could seriously go on and on and on and on and... well you get the point... about what i want off this site.

lets hit the high points.

How do I convince the hubbeast these would be a wonderful anniversary gift:

(i have a thing for ninja's)

Queen of Hearts Baking Set

"LOVE" Cake Pan

Heart Shaped Kitchen Spatula

Teacupcakes Silicone Tea Cup Shaped Baking Molds

(I also have a HUGE thing for cupcakes)

I could go on... and i'm not even done looking through the whole website yet. I haven't even gotten to the clothes. THE CLOTHES PEOPLE

Go, Shop, Be happy!


(semi)-Wordless Wednesday

yep.... this picture pretty much sums up my feelings toward my travel from iraq to the states.
my deployment husband took this picture (I didn't see it untill today almost a year later)
our plane out of out of our location, left over 24 hours before his.
then my rotator out of the desert got delayed 18 hours, and he got there, and left before me.
the fucker.
but i did make it home before he did.
got to love military travel.
And after a rough past couple days!
This picture just sums it all up.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010 0 comments


I stole borrowed this from a blog I stalk follow. Sarah @ Yes and Yes.

Sometimes on a bad day, you need a little perspective.

Saturday, June 5, 2010 0 comments

Lesson in Leaving

Lets just classify these last 2 days as "one of those days". You know where you just don't quite feel 100%.

There's really no reason for me to feel off, but i do. I'm healthy, I'm relatively happy, but its just not the same with out B here. I know, I'm lucky, i get to talk to him almost every day. On the weekends sometimes multiple times in the day, with text messages to boot.

This is the longest time I've been away from him and been home. Its weird to be home to be honest.

When i was in Iraq. I was gone roughly: 135 days

B will be gone roughly: 116 days.

No one really understands how you can possibly be away from each other 100 days or more from your husband, wife, or loved one.

Its not easy.... but its how I've known to live.

There's really no point to this post. but I've been feeling all mixed up and jumbled and its kind of hard to get out a fluid thought out if my life depended on it.

but eh. whats a blog for if not to spew streams of thought, no matter the completeness of the thought.

I think I'll leave you all with this picture. My friend was messing around on photoshop and made it for me. I love her and I love this picture!

Wednesday, June 2, 2010 2 comments

Work.... oh what to say

Besides.... "I QUIT!"

Yep, today was my last day of work! There was a lot of things that added up to my deciding to quit.

The main reason i could quit was the fact that B left and he's going to be getting money, so i can finally go back to school! I'm super excited, but that's for another day.

Okay back to my list of grievances

Grievance #1 - The way I was treated when i came home from Iraq. I was 'eliminated' from my job because my 'temp' that was hired became my new supervisor. And they effectively eliminated my position with out taking into consideration laws, what they were doing, and what they were supposed to do. They way they handled that was really really shaddy.

Grievance #2 - When I fell. On Feb 9th i fell down the stairs at work. The way they handled my injury, the way they dealt with my doctors appointments, physical therapy appointments, and having absolutely NO compassion for me. Again, NOT OK with me.

Grievance #3 - A couple months ago our bathroom broke. I've been working out pretty hard and need to get a lot of water in me. so I use the bathroom a lot. probably every 2 hours or so. I was told (and i quote) "I can not allow you to go to the bathroom in the other building, so you'll have to go only on your breaks or wear depends" by my boss. yeah. she honestly said that.

Grievance #4 - this was the straw that broke the camels back. My uncle recently passed. When he went into the hospital, i told my boss that i couldn't stay late because we were going to the hospital to say our final goodbyes she said "::eye roll:: we got that phone call at least 3 times with my grandma, you can stay" and then proceeded to tell the person on the phone I'd stay, so i was stuck doing it. then left me there to close knowing full well my mom was waiting on me. She's seriously so many levels of wrong its not even funny.

I'm so glad to be finally done with that place. 2 years, tons of tears, and a lot of stress later... i am done. and I'm glad to be done.

but in the last 2 days I've been busier than ever. and I LOVE IT!

Tuesday, June 1, 2010 0 comments

lets talk about the weather

I mean seriously? Does this god forsaken state not know that its JUNE!?! i mean come on, its so hot in this freaking apartment right now its not even funny.

when i get paid, i'm really going to have to go get a couple fans. this still hot sticky air has got to go. ick.